Your Nervous System Comes to Rehearsal Too
Next, as part of the self-regulation series, I'd like to talk about what's happening in our bodies when we get dysregulated. Again, this is inspired by my training at IDC. I’ll drop some references at the bottom, check them out, if that’s of interest to you.
You know the phrase, where ever you go, there you are?
Your nervous system is like that. It’s in the room for auditions, rehearsals, tough conversations, celebrations and everything in between.
Your Body Is Trying to Keep You Safe
When our brain perceives a threat, our autonomic nervous system shifts into a sympathetic state to prepare us for action. Our heart rate increases. Blood is redirected to the muscles that would help us fight or escape.
If you're being chased by a bear, this response might save your life.
However, if you are being pursued by a bear only to exit Stage Left (if you know you know), this response can prevent you from doing your best work.
Our nervous systems can’t always distinguish between physical danger and social danger. As such, we can react to receiving a difficult note as though survival is at stake.
Fight. Flight. Freeze. Fawn.
These are all signs of dysregulation/common ways the nervous system responds when it perceives a threat.
Fight seeks safety through confrontation.
Flight seeks safety through escape.
Freeze seeks safety through stillness.
Fawn seeks safety through connection.
In a rehearsal room, these responses might look like arguing, avoiding, going blank, or people-pleasing. The behaviours are different, but they share the same underlying purpose: each is an attempt to find safety.
Regulation Is Contagious
Our nervous systems don't exist in isolation. We constantly influence one another. A calm, grounded director can help settle an entire rehearsal room. A regulated stage manager can help de-escalate a stressful production day.
The opposite is also true.
One dysregulated person can unintentionally activate everyone else.
So, self-regulation isn't just something we do for ourselves. It's something we offer the people we work with. This is why self-regulation is such a powerful skill.
First, it's our responsibility to arrive as regulated as we reasonably can, so we don't unintentionally add stress to the room. Second, our own regulation can help co-regulate the people around us. The way we show up shapes the environment we create together.
What Works for Me
These are a few practices that have made a meaningful difference:
Doing a brain dump before a stressful meeting so I'm not carrying twenty unfinished thoughts into the room. (I do it as a voice note, or voice to text)
Leaving transition time between tasks instead of rushing from one responsibility straight into another.
Walking.
Pausing before responding to feedback. (This is a struggle for me)
Always leaving at least 30 minutes between reading a difficult email and responding. (Life changing)
Protecting quiet moments between rehearsals instead of filling every break with conversation.
Stepping away from conversations that leave me feeling cynical/drained rather than connected.
I also like affirmations and mantras tailored to the task at hand: My work is not my worth. I offer steadiness to the room. That is enough for today.
If You Are Curious
Here are some points of reference. I am really loving Deb Dana’s Nervous System Workbook lately.
Hank Green’s Autonomic Nervous System Crash Course: https://youtu.be/71pCilo8k4M?si=KIf1MKBT7cR-6T49 (be warned this is from 2015, the vibe is deeply millennial)
Anchored by Deb Dana (an introduction to understanding your nervous system and building regulation skills)
The Nervous System Workbook by Deb Dana (practical exercises for noticing and supporting your nervous system)